Do you push yourself to meet every deadline? Do you consider every task a top priority? Do you multi-task everything? Do you feel guilty when you have free time? You qualify for a new group of behaviors called "excessive time urgency."   Why are you in such a hurry? Because you excessively worry about schedules and rush as a habit even when it is not necessary to hurry.  I realized that my father was rushed and rushing us when going places because he was worried about the appearance of being late. He was stuck on the idea that if you cannot get there on time, don’t bother showing up. That created a lot of stress in the process of getting ready to go anywhere for all of us. You might have a friend that is constantly in motion. If there is not enough activity, this friend will make a new project and attempt to pull you into the activity. If you want help cleaning out your closets, invite this friend over. However being around constant high levels of energy can be exhausting when you just want to sit quietly with a cup of tea. So consider your needs and activity levels when you plan your down time. Do you allow yourself down time? Time with nothing in particular planned for you to do? What are the consequences of getting stuck in this pattern of hurry up no matter what? You will have high stress levels based on your constant whirlwind of activity. Part of your rush is based on getting everything just right. This perfectionism creates unrealistic expectations and more stress. When you hurry you are more likely to make mistakes which leads to rework. Rework adds to an already busy schedule. You will miss out on the everyday joy around you. There is no time for self-care and playtime when your life is in hurry up mode.   Why are you in such a hurry? What are you missing out on? How do you break this pattern of hurry up no matter what?  Focus on one thing at a time. Give your full attention to one thing; see how that feels for a change. Rethink, reflect and prioritize your tasks. Not everything is high priority. Separate work from play. Allow time to be flexible with your recreational activity. Plan ahead. Planning avoids the rush because you did not think ahead. Set up planning time so you can think ahead without the pressure of instant decisions on what is up next. Get realistic about your expectations of time. Are you trying to do too many things in too short of a time? Slow down. Pay attention to life and people around you. Listen first before you jump into action. That alone can save you time by having all the information first. Allow down time everyday just for you. Start with 10 minutes. Take that time for doing nothing. It might be uncomfortable. Try it and see what happens. "Hurry up no matter what" is a pattern of activity that leads to burnout and overwhelm. When you slow down to recognize that you have choices, time can be a gift instead of another stress factor.    

  Happiness is what we strive for. Many life changes have been made in the pursuit of happiness. How do our daily actions impact our state of happiness? Happiness is a process not a place. Consider five things that you need to give up to be happy. Give up complaining. The more you complain about something the more power, time and energy you lose thinking about something.  Give up limiting beliefs. Many times we don’t take action or we avoid trying something new because we believe we can’t do it or that we might fail or make a mistake. Open up your mind to all options and consider if your belief is based on your current reality.   Stop negative self-talk. How we talk to ourselves has a big impact on our interpretation of events and how we feel about the outcome. Listen to your self-talk for a day to determine how much of it is supportive and positive or negative.   Give up on being perfect. Perfectionism is a barrier to learning and personal development. Adults learn by trial and error. By expecting to be perfect most people avoid the very things or activities that will help them learn and grow.   Give up making choices to impress other people. You are the one living your life. It only makes sense that you make the choices that support your own needs and goals.   Robert Biswas-Diener from Portland State University has 3 areas of focus that will improve your happiness factor. How to find Happiness article based on Biswas-Diener Focus on the positive. Be optimistic. Relieve your positive moments. Choose to interpret events in a positive manner. Remember that what you focus on grows. So give up the negative things to be happy.. What brings you joy? What stops you from being happy? I believe that happiness is a state of mind. You deserve to have happiness in your life. What are you willing to do right now to bring more joy into your life? Take assessment: Are you Happy? Is it that simple? Just decide to be happy? Not sure. Try a new plan. You don’t have to make changes alone. Get a coaching session with Coach Gwen.    

Thinking about stress relief can relieve stress in reality. When it comes to simple ways to reduce stress, what we think about matters. When you engage in positive thinking, visual relaxation and affirmations, you can lower the levels of stress. Because stress is often the result of over-thinking, if you change your thoughts, you can bring on an instant sense of relaxation. Change your attitude and you can change your stress level. True or false? True. This is particularly true for those pessimists, perfectionists, and “type A” personalities. People with those personality traits  usually have certain behavior and thought patterns that cause their body to have too much to deal with. What can you do to reduce stress? Simple things can reduce stress. Even those simple things like dark chocolate, music, meditation, laughing, exercise, or even sleeping can help you reduce stress effectively and leave you feeling bright, fresh and rejuvenated. Laughing can lower stress hormones such as epinephrine, cortisol, and adrenaline, and strengthen the immune system by producing health-promoting hormones. Playing with your pets can reduce stress. Pets offer non-judgmental companionship, which is a big plus to your mental outlook. Playing or petting an animal can increase levels of the stress-reducing hormone oxytocin and decrease production of the stress hormone cortisol. Exercise increases your overall health and your sense of well-being, which puts more pep in your step every day. But exercise also has some direct stress-busting benefits. It pumps up your endorphins. Physical activity helps bump up the production of your brain's feel-good neurotransmitters, called endorphins. Does it matter what type of exercise? No. Anything that you enjoy will decrease stress. Getting outside in natural sunlight can be the most enjoyable activity and easy to do.

Do you love to exercise? Are you motivated to exercise? Or do you dread exercise and think of it as something you should do? Do you think that if you exercise you can eat anything you want? Guess again. Here are  three hidden truths about exercise that you need to know. The truths about exercise: Your current motivation is based on your past It turns our that your past relationship with exercise has everything to do with what motivates you to exercise now. Michelle Segar has made a study of the science of motivation with exercise. Her simple advice makes sense. "Take any and every opportunity to move, in any way possible, at what ever speed you like, for any amount of time. Do what makes you feel good; stop doing what makes you feel bad." You cannot outrun your fork. No amount of exercise will allow you to eat junk food, high processed foods, and sugar filled drinks. So give up on the idea that exercise will allow you to eat anything you want.  Exercise has to be something you like to do When you think of exercise as a chore or something you must accomplish, it becomes easy to avoid or to give it a low priority. What motivates people, is to choose things we like to do, that make us feel good. Exercise is just the way you keep your body in shape, so that you can enjoy all of the things you want to do in life. You only get one body. You cannot trade it in like a used car. Exercise is not running on a treadmill until you are miserable. Exercise is any activity that elevates your heart rate and gets you moving. If you don’t like exercise, find an activity that you do like. Here are some ideas: Dance at a club or in your own home to favorite tunes Take a class – try something you have never done Hike / walk. Walk to do your errands ... Gardening or yard work Play ball or catch with your dog, kids, or friends Clean out a closet or your garage Play outside - remember how we did that as kids Shoot baskets - you don’t have to be good at it The truth about exercise ... be creative and have fun moving.  

  Why do you want to create a healthy lifestyle? If you don’t understand why you want to make a change, it is difficult to start. Without any momentum you quickly lose motivation because you don’t see any results. Just because "you should" or are "supposed to" eat healthy or exercise, is a weak basis for creating lasting change. Instead, consider internal motivation. Here are some examples that may provide you a stronger reason for making change:  I want to have more energy. I want to feel better. I want to be able to play with my kids or grandkids. If you are unsure of why change is important to you, try asking yourself better questions. Here are some questions to ask yourself about why you are making time for self-care:  What do I expect from making healthy changes?  Why is it important to me to feel good? What has stopped me in the past from sticking to healthy goals? Who can I ask to support me in these changes? What behavior(s) or habit(s) are hurting me? What are my sources of joy? Why would I bother to be healthy? What happens if I do nothing?  Once you have a clear idea of why you want to feel healthy, write it out and post it somewhere you will see every day. Read your “why” statement everyday ... out loud. Sounds a little corny to do this, right? The reason to read this out loud is to reaffirm to your commitment every day. That alone is a powerful force and it sends a strong message to your brain that your actions need to match your thoughts. Create a strategy or road map for change. Start only with changes that you are willing to act on. Taking small actions builds your belief in moving towards success. Momentum begins the day you start making small changes. Motivation comes with doing things you like and enjoying the process. So no matter how small your first step, use that momentum to build motivation towards your healthy goals. Coaching support can kick start the process and suppport your momentum in reaching your healthy lifestyle goal.